How Spiritual Gifts Shape Our Personality
I’m An Extrovert.
If I’m thinking it, I’m probably saying it. This can be annoying, both to me and the people around me. I often speak before my brain catches up, and afterward I’m left wondering, “Why did I even say that?”
Worse, when someone else is talking, my mind throws out five questions and a handful of tangents before they’re even done. It’s like I’m already in the next part of the conversation before they’ve finished their sentence.
Meanwhile, my wife is the opposite.
Introvert Meets Extrovert
Nicole’s an introvert. She has no problem holding her thoughts. She’s a great listener, tuned in to what’s really being said. When she finally speaks, it’s worth hearing.
But here’s the flip side: When conversations get tense, Nicole often freezes. Her mind slows down, and she can’t get her words out fast enough. Later, she’ll tell me all the things she wishes she had said.
Funny how it works. As an extrovert, I wish I hadn’t said what I did. And as an introvert, she wishes she had spoken up. We often long for the traits we don’t naturally have.
Then Jesus Steps In
This is where the spiritual side enters. When we come to Jesus, we’re not just saved, we’re gifted. Spiritual gifts don’t replace who we are, but add a missing dimension to our personality. They’re how God completes the puzzle of who we’re created to be.
In Paul’s letter to the Roman Church, he explains it beautifully:
“We have different gifts, according to the grace given to us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy… if it is serving, then serve… if it is teaching, then teach… if it is to encourage, then give encouragement… if it is giving, then give generously… if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.” – Romans 12:6–8
I Struggle with Mercy
That won’t surprise anyone who knows me. I’m not unkind; it just doesn’t occur to me right away. Same with serving and hospitality. My default thought process is: “If someone needs something, they’ll ask.”
Nicole, on the other hand, is incredibly aware of people’s needs; often before they even speak. She’s always anticipating how to bless others. Multiple times, she’s looked outside at workers in our complex and said to our sons, “Boys, do you think those guys would like some fresh baked cookies?”
Answer: Of course they would!
Our Gifts Fit Our Personalities
I’m passionate about leadership. Like Nicole’s heart to serve, it’s not something I have to work at. I feel most at peace when I’m writing, teaching, leading discussions, vision-casting or coordinating a mission or event.
I believe God intentionally connects spiritual gifts and personality. He doesn’t override who we are, but instead, He completes who we are. Our spiritual gifting works in harmony with how we’re wired. When we receive the Holy Spirit, something clicks. It just feels right.
Join the Conversation; Share Your Thoughts
- How have you seen your personality and gifting work together in ministry?
- What part of your personality do you love—or struggle with?
- Which spiritual gifts have surfaced in your life?
