Do You Mentor or Coach the People You Lead

Many people use the terms mentor and coach interchangeably. But I would suggest to you that they aren’t. A mentor invests without a shared goal. A coach invests for the end goal. Both serve a purpose; I’m just saying they’re not equal. And knowing which one the person in front of you needs can be the difference between significant growth and spinning your wheels.

How I Decide to Mentor or Coach Someone

When I first started walking with younger leaders, I defaulted to mentoring every time. I’d share with them what I’d learned, help them through situations and struggles, checking in regularly. This works great when someone genuinely needs direction, like a new believer trying to figure out how to read their Bible, or a young leader stepping into a role they’ve never held before. Experience and practical skill can save someone years of trial and error.

Coaching moves in a slightly different direction. The connection is around a specific goal or objective; maybe even a certain type of person they’re striving to become. Instead of helping them navigate life’s ups and downs, coaching keeps the person on point. It’s a more focused approach.

“The purpose in a man’s heart is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out” (Proverbs 20:5).

The Biblical Case to Mentor or Coach Well

Scripture gives us both patterns, and neither one gets treated as more spiritual than the other. Paul told Timothy to take what he’d learned and entrust it to faithful men who would teach others also (2 Timothy 2:2). That’s mentoring. Direct, experience based, hands on.

Jesus, on the other hand, spent a lot of His time with the disciples asking questions He already knew the answers to, letting them wrestle toward conviction instead of just handing them conclusions. I don’t think Jesus was choosing coaching over mentoring as some kind of superior method. He used both, depending on what the moment and the person in front of Him called for.

That’s the freedom we should try to walk in too. Adjusting the relationship depending on the person and objective is an important part of the journey.

What This Looks Like in Real Ministry

Over the past few months I’ve had a couple of leaders that I’ve meet with, and I’ve treated them differently on purpose.

• One is still fairly new to leadership, so I mentor him more directly, walking him through how I’d handle a tough conversation or structure a sermon series.
• The other has been leading for years and just needs someone to coach him, ask him the right questions so he can hear his own convictions out loud.

Neither approach is better. The type of investment just suited to different people at different points in their walk with Jesus.

Take Time to Reflect

If you’re leading or discipling someone right now, it’s worth asking yourself which one they actually need from you.

• Are they looking for someone to put wisdom into them?
• Are they ready for someone to help draw out the wisdom God’s already growing in them?

Either way, the goal is the same. Help them grow closer to Jesus and more confident in who He’s made them to be.